100 Words or Less: Wolverine (2013)

This is a pretty good film. Good action, good drama, decent logic, and a good romance arc. Does well at both following X3 and setting up DOFP, while definitely not being an “X-Men” movie -- it’s all Logan.

Also, I’m a sucker for the bone claws.

I tried to avoid the hype, because I knew that would only lessen it, but still, so many people were saying things like “The Wolverine Movie I’ve Always Wanted” and it wasn’t that. Not for me.

I wanted a berserker rage scene, and I wanted actual samurai training, and I didn’t get that.

100 Words or Less: X-Men: First Class (2011)

To be honest, there’s a lot in this movie I’m not fond of, mainly Mystique. Her relationship with Charles was my biggest issue, but also the transition to the original trilogy version was a forced and unnatural change, I don’t buy that they are the same character. 

Also, a non-Nightcrawler teleporter is always a negative for me, but at least Azazel is his father. And badass.

Thankfully, this film does so much right that I can look past the wrong:

Xavier and Eric’s relationship, new characters, humans’ heightening awareness of mutants.

The Xavier training sequence is amazing.

And Moira MacTaggert.

100 Words or Less: X-Men Origins: Wolverine (2009)

This is actually my least favorite X-Men movie.

Plenty of reasons people disliked this film: Altered characters, powers, and histories for no apparent reason. (Iron Man 3 should have realized that didn’t work).

Also, having a teleporter that isn’t Nightcrawler makes me sad.

However, the reason this is my least favorite X-Men film is, well, because it’s not an X-Men film -- it’s a Wolverine film. This doesn’t have the mutant vs human feeling of the X-Men.

However, the redemption for this film comes via Sabretooth and his history and relationship with Wolverine.

Mid-credits scene, and two different post-credits scenes!

100 Words or Less: X-Men: The Last Stand (2006)

This is the X-Men film people love to hate, but honestly I don’t know why. Sure, it has its issues, but any film does, and not every film is going to be great. I like the film, despite its flaws.

Some things to like:

- The only X-Men film to have the original team.

- Great fight between Pryo and Iceman, with Iceman finally going full throttle and converting his whole body into solid ice.

- Kelsey Grammar is perfect as Beast.

- Shadowcat, Iceman, and Colossus get to actually participate in combat.

Can’t wait for Days of Future Past

100 Words or Less: X2: X-Men United (2003)

This is my favorite X-Men movie.

The biggest reason is Nightcrawler. He’s always been my favorite mutant. And this movie makes him badass. The opening White House scene is amazing.

Also, Wolverine defending the mansion. First time we really got to see Logan let loose, and it was awesome. 

Add to that Lady Deathstrike, and the spectacular fight scene.

Additionally, making the mutant-human debate personal with Bobby’s family added depth.

Finally, I loved the villains working together with the heroes for the greater good of mutantkind.

Even Iceman, Pyro, and Colossus, in smaller parts, had their moments to shine.

100 Words or Less: X-Men (2000)

This film is important for many reasons. After Batman & Robin pissed off audiences
everywhere, nearly killing the superhero genre, this movie, along with Blade, revived the
genre.

Not only that, but it set the formula on how to write a good ensemble superhero
film, something that wouldn't be outdone until The Avengers.

And then you've got the
element of diversity: strong female characters, one of them black, a handicapped team
leader, and a Jew. This movie captured the essence of the comic and set up a franchise to
remember. And it did it on a low budget.

100 Words or Less: Green Lantern (2011)

This film had a lot of problems.

It was campy.

The villain was cliche.

It was unoriginal. “Humans are worthless...but not”

It made the same giant mistake seen in FF:ROTSS (besides Jessica Alba) -- the villain is a giant cloud.

Despite that, and what people say, I enjoyed (most of) it.

Perhaps the most important thing about this film, in relation to the future of DC films, is that DC is full of god-like heroes, and this portrayal of GL needs to stick to balance out Justice League. Let Hal be the Tony Stark of the group.

100 Words or Less: The Lone Ranger (2013)

There is a lot of hate for this movie. And I’m not completely sure why. Yes, there are several stupid moments, cliches, and failed attempts to show an epic shot. But overall this movie was pretty enjoyable. The acting was well-done, the story was pretty straightforward.

More development could have gone to the Ranger. Like, why was he so against guns? And why did he so suddenly change his mind?

I was afraid that Depp/Tonto would overshadow Hammer/Reid as he did in the promotional material, but it didn’t come across that way to me in the film.

100 Words or Less: Mystery Men (1999)

Ben Stiller is the same in this movie as he is in every movie.

Superpowers here include super-farts, a magic bowling ball, turning invisible (when no one is looking) throwing silverware, and being able to “shovel well.”

I knew not to expect much action from a superhero film starring Stiller, Hank Azaria, and William H. Macy, but I thought it would at least be funny. But it isn’t. It either takes itself too seriously, or not seriously enough, I’m not sure.

I don’t care for the heroes, or the villain (Geoffrey Rush). I don’t care about any of them.

100 Words or Less: Super (2010)

When your movie stars Rainn Wilson as the lead superhero, you’ve got quite a hole to dig yourself out of.

Kevin Bacon does well as the villain, but Ellen Page steals the show as the sidekick.

I hate Liv Tyler, and I’m pretty sure I was supposed to in this movie, but that’s my main problem: I didn’t believe in the hero’s cause.

People will compare this to Kick-Ass, but while Kick-Ass is a reflection of society and a response to that, Super is more comedic, and violent for the sake of being violent.

Nathan Fillion is “The Holy Avenger”

100 Words or Less: Batman: The Movie (1966)

This Bat-film had so much Bat-camp it was Bat-ridiculous. That Bat-said, given that that’s exactly what the Bat-producers were going for, I can’t take away any Bat-credit for that.

Lee Meriwether as Catwoman is as sexy today as it was almost 50 years ago.

Dynamic Duo. Four well-known villains. Even though it’s as silly as can be, with the right mindset, it’s still enjoyable.

I must say though, I’m happy that Batman didn’t stay this campy forever.

FYI: It’s not “Bat-Shark Repellant,” it’s Shark repellant Bat-Spray

100 Words or Less: Catwoman (2004)

Acting: awful. Story: awful. CGI: Awful.

Selina Kyle? No, Patience Phillips.

Experienced cat burglar who has developed her skills over many years?

No Patience is breathed on by a magical cat (not at all a rip-off of being bitten by a radioactive spider), and gets the abilities of a cat. Speed, agility, super-senses. This also somehow turns her into an expert fighter and gives her proficient skill with a whip literally overnight.

She also has like, magical multiple cat-human personality disorder, or something.

Intended to be a superhero movie for women. Except the costume completely objectifies her. 

Epic fail.

Me-ouch.

100 Words or Less: Dredd (2012)

It’s like Batman, Punisher, X-Men, and Rambo all rolled into one. Hugely entertaining. Story was simple and direct. Karl Urban not only portrays the character well, but does it all without ever showing his whole face, something not many Hollywood stars would do.

I’m especially impressed with the way Olivia Thirlby’s character Anderson was handled. They managed to make a gorgeous woman an equally engaging hero as Dredd. The only sexist scene was a dream sequence. 

Fully clothed in armor the entire film, she manages to be gorgeous and strong throughout. Perfect female character.

Good flick, very enjoyable, very bloody.

100 Words or Less: Stamp Day for Superman (1954 short film)

A Superman PSA to encourage kids to help out the government. That’s basically all this is. 

Defined either as a short film or an “extra episode” to the TV show, it’s about 18 minutes long and features Superman catching a robber who steals because he never learned how to save money. Meanwhile, Jimmy Olsen learned well as a child and buys a new fancy typewriter.

In the spirit of saving, don’t bother buying anything that includes this, just watch it for free on YouTube.

Noel Neill steals the spotlight, still my favorite Lois.

100 Words or Less: Iron Man 3 (2013)

Plot holes everywhere, the story suffered from Shane Black’s influence, and in the end the poor story is really what brings this film down. I personally didn’t like the twist, but if the movie had been written well, I could get past that. 

Aside from plot holes, characterizations are all off, especially Pepper.

The performances by RDJ and Don Cheadle are really the only things that save this movie (to an extent). Even though I hate the story, I could still enjoy watching RDJ play Tony Stark.

This film is my least favorite of the MCU.

100 Words or Less: *minor spoilers* Man of Steel (2013)

This movie had the potential to be amazing. It was very well done, but a few things kept it from being as great as I thought it could be.

I disagree with Snyder’s focus on aliens/first contact, instead of the superhero feel Superman has become an icon of.

Characters are only skin deep.  Especially disappointed with Amy Adams (Lois).

I hated how they killed Jonathan.

In general, it felt too much like a remake of Superman II than a new installment to reboot the franchise.

Hopefully the sequel can pick up with the positives and skyrocket from there. Such potential.

100 Words or Less: Superman (1948)

This was a well-made serial.

Kirk Alyn (uncredited) did great job at portraying two different characters. Noel Neill is now my favorite Lois.  She captures the essence without being annoying. I loved her hat.

Phrases like “This looks like a job for Superman” and “Up, up, and awaaaaay!” were overused. Superman’s powers were animated, which looked silly, but for the 1940s, I’d rather have a well-done animated sequence over ridiculous live-action. They were edited quite well, although some segments were overused.

These flaws would have been reduced by seeing one chapter a week, but I watched it in one sitting.

100 Words or Less: Batman and Robin (1949 serial)

I’m not sure how many film serials had sequels, but this was one of those sequels. Somehow, even though everything was marginally better than the original (acting, costumes, music), this one was still worse. Probably because the plot was so much more boring. New cast, so no Alfred to save the day. And though the acting in the original wasn’t great, I could at least buy that everybody looked the part. In this take, Robin looked older than Batman.

This one also took me two sittings to finish.

There was one thing that stayed the same for the sequel: Fedoras

100 Words or Less: Batman (1943 serial)

Very old. Very Racist. Bad costumes. Horrible fight choreography. Despite the age, and the medium (serial as opposed to film), it’s hard to take seriously. It’s hard for most modern viewers to appreciate a serial. Watching it in one sitting (or two), was hard. Constant cliffhangers, redundancies everywhere.

It introduced the Batcave to the mythology, and it earned a sequel. Really, though, the only positive thing was William Austin as Alfred. 70 years ago, this may have been exciting. But the dialogue is awful. And the actor playing the lead will forever have me refer to this as “Fatman.”

Fedoras.

Operation: 100 Words or Less

Just how much is (are?) 100 words?

After reading some humorous reviews of the Superman films of the 1970s-80s, I’ve been inspired to go back through the old superhero films and give a fresh take on them here on this blog. But that’s a daunting task. There are easily over 50 films up for review (note: I’ll only be reviewing the films I own, which is most, but not all of them). The catch? I’ll try to keep these reviews short and to the point: 100 words or less. How much is that? I’ve used 100 words in this post.

(OK, I'm past 100 words, but I want to put up the list of films to come...)

Again, I'm only reviewing the films I own or have regular, dependable, legal access to (Netfilx). This is because, before each review, I will watch the film. So, this is going to take several months. I'll go in spurts based on character, so I'll start with the character with the most films in the following list: Batman. Look for his first review this week!

1940s - Superheroes in film serials

DC:

-Batman (1943 serial)
-Superman (1948 serial)

-Batman and Robin (1949 serial)

Marvel:
-Captain America (1944 serial)

1950s - George Reeves brings Superman to Life on TV

-Atom Man vs. Superman (1950 serial)
-Superman and the Mole Men (1951)
-Stamp Day for Superman (1954)

1960s - Adam West makes Batman an icon

DC:
-Batman: The Movie (1966)

1970s - Superman takes over

DC:

-Superman (1978)

Marvel:

-Spider-Man (1977)

-The Incredible Hulk (1977)

-Dr. Strange (1978)

-Captain America (1979)

-Captain America II: Death Too Soon (1979)

1980s - Superman fades and Batman re-emerges

DC:
-Superman II (1980)

-Superman III (1983)

-Supergirl (1984)
-Superman IV: The Quest for Peace (1987)
-Batman (1989)

Marvel:

-Howard the Duck (1986)

-The Incredible Hulk Returns (1988)

-The Punisher (1989)

-The Trial of the Incredible Hulk (1989)

1990-1995 - Batman is cool again

DC:

-Batman Returns (1992)

-Batman Forever (1995)

Marvel:

-Captain America (1990)

-The Death of the Incredible Hulk (1990)

-The Fantastic Four (1994)

Dark Horse:
-The Mask (1994)

Rebellion:
-Judge Dredd (2005)

Independent:
-Darkman (1990)

1996-2000 - Batman is ruined, now it's Marvel's turn to shine

DC:

-Batman & Robin (1997)

-Steel (1997)

Marvel:

-Blade (1998)

-X-Men (2000)

Image:

-Spawn (1997)

Dark Horse:
-Mystery Men (1999)

2002 - Spider-Man is here, and the superhero genre explodes

DC:

-Road to Perdition

Marvel:

-Blade II

-Spider-Man

2003 - DC still recovering, Marvel expanding

DC:

-The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen 

Marvel:

-Daredevil

-X2: X-Men United

-Hulk

2004 - DC flops a spinoff, Marvel continues to grow

DC:
-Catwoman

Marvel:

-The Punisher

-Spider-Man 2

-Blade: Trinity

Dark Horse:
-Hellboy

2005 - Batman is back

DC:

-Batman Begins

-V for Vendetta

Marvel:

-Elektra

-Man-Thing

-Fantastic Four

Dark Horse:

-Sin City

-Son of the Mask

2006 - Superman is back. Well, kind of.

DC:

-Superman Returns

-Superman Returns: The Richard Donner Cut

Marvel:

-X-Men: The Last Stand

2007 - Marvel flops thrice, 300 gains attention

Marvel:

-Ghost Rider

-Spider-Man 3

-Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer

Dark Horse:
-300

2008 - Superhero films are no longer just for nerds

DC:

-The Dark Knight

-The Spirit

Marvel:

-Iron Man

-The Incredible Hulk

-Punisher: War Zone

Dark Horse:
-Hellboy II: The Golden Army

Independent:
-Hancock

2009 - Source material? What source material.

DC:

-Watchmen

Marvel:

-X-Men Origins: Wolverine

2010 - The Avengers are coming, DC isn't even trying.

DC:

-Jonah Hex

-The Losers

Marvel:

-Iron Man 2

-Kick-Ass

Independent:
-Super

2011 - DC Disappoints fans yet again. X-Men saved.

DC:
-Green Lantern

Marvel:

-Thor

-X-Men: First Class

-Captain America: The First Avenger

2012 - Batman vs. Avengers

DC:

-The Dark Knight Rises

Marvel:

-Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance

-The Avengers

-The Amazing Spider-Man

Rebellion:
-Dredd

2013 - Superman, again.

DC:

-Man of Steel

Marvel:

-Iron Man 3

-The Wolverine

-Kick-Ass 2

-Thor: The Dark World

Dark Horse:
-R.I.P.D.
-Sin City: A Dame to Kill For

Independent:
-The Lone Ranger